By Sherry Jackson, President’s Circle Program Coordinator at Life University
Relationships are the foundation of our human existence. Strong, loving, nurturing
and meaningful relationships are crucial to life. Without this human interaction,
life is meaningless and incomplete. Yet, making them work effectively remains
to be a bit of a mystery to most.
What if we used integrity, the state of being whole and complete, as a blueprint
for how we manage our relationships? Would our relationships have more substance
and fewer problems?
Guy Riekeman, D.C., president of Life University, has used integrity for more
than 20 years as the foundation for his philosophy in establishing and maintaining
positive personal and professional relationships. Riekeman has passionately
dedicated himself to increasing awareness and encouraging chiropractors regarding
the responsibilities and outcomes of the choices they make.
“Integrity in a relationship comes down to outcomes, not an emotional
or moral issue,” clarifies Riekeman. “Do you want mediocre, ill-defined
relationships that end up as problems or do you want ones with the possibility
of empowerment and excellence?”
Living with honesty is a powerful tool in self awareness and personal conviction.
The more consistent you are in your thoughts, words and actions, the easier
it becomes to be true to yourself and to others. Once you are aligned with integrity
“the reward is self-respect, clarity and inner peace that comes from being
true to your values,” says Riekeman.
Building Integrity in Relationships
The essential element to living with uncompromising adherence to moral and ethical
principles is the implementation of your values. Your actions and choices determine
the level of accountability for the events in your life. It is only from a position
of personal ownership that you can be in a state of wholeness and completeness.
Relationships work effectively when truth is acknowledged. According to an integrity
management process created by Riekeman, the outcome of not having integrity
in a relationship is mediocrity. The outcome of being in integrity is the possibility
of empowerment and excellence.
Step Two: Set up an agreement with yourself. The list that
you created in Step One lays the foundation for this agreement with yourself.
Write down your commitment/priorities and the action steps you plan to take.
This can be done for both professional and personal goals. Integrity means that
no matter what comes up, you will honor your agreement with yourself.
Step Three: Identify a list of the most important people in
your personal and professional life. For example, your spouse or significant
other, parents and friends, business partners and employees should be included
in your list. Next, you should rank these people in their order of importance
to you.
Step Four: Make agreements with each person on your list of
important life relationships.
As you begin to set up agreements with each individual, discuss your personal
values and priorities and how much time you have to achieve your goals. There
are three ways to set up agreements with individuals: written, spoken and unstated.
Written is the clearest way, because both parties are clear on the intention
and outcome. Spoken is good. However, you might later forget the intentions
and outcomes. Unstated is something that is assumed by one or both and often
turns out poorly.
Step Five: Honor the agreements that you made with yourself
and others. Integrity means that no matter what comes up, you honor the agreements.
“The challenge is to see how far you can expand your horizon of accountability
with regard to self, family and your business,” says Riekeman.
Building and managing integrity in a relationship requires consistency in your
thoughts, words, and actions. “It’s not about being perfect nor
never making a mistake,” says Riekeman. “It’s a way of life.
So, when you are out of integrity, it’s about acknowledging and taking
responsibility, cleaning it up and bringing your actions and self back into
integrity.”