By William N. Willis, D.C.
As a chiropractic college student, I once accompanied a friend on a trip into
Atlanta to view the construction of a large office building. We had heard that
it was going to be one of the tallest skyscrapers around, and we wanted to see
it going up.
We drove down, parked on a side street and made our way to the vast lot that
sat squarely at the intersection of two major streets. A tall chain-link fence
kept the curious out of harm’s way, but we could clearly see the bustle
of activity. Work had been under way for some time, and I had expected to see
a massive steel skeleton reaching up into the sky. Surprisingly, however, all
I saw was a mammoth gaping hole.
Workers in hardhats were busy driving steel casings deep into the earth. I quickly
learned that before you can erect a tall building, you have to anchor it with
a deep foundation.
Our lives are much like that soaring skyscraper with its deep foundation. The
larger your life, the deeper you must dig down through your values. You reach
up through your vision for your life and your practice, but to maintain stability
you must keep your feet firmly planted through a close adherence to your values.
In my last column, I wrote about the pressures that everyone—particularly
those of us in the chiropractic profession—are under. Many of us feel we’re
contestants in a real-life version of the popular TV show Survivor. Every day
brings new, seemingly overwhelming challenges. If we don’t meet them, we
know we’re likely to get “voted off.”
How do you prepare yourself for these challenges? While many people concentrate
on developing external devices or tactics for coping, the best weapon in your
survivor arsenal can be found within. That weapon is your values.
You must have principles that guide how you live your life. Whether they are
positive ones or not, they are powerful forces that determine your actions.
Depending upon what your values are, and the order of importance you place on
each one, you will always be inclined to choose one course of action over another.
The person who places his family at the top of his value priority list is going
to order his life and work around taking care of them. He or she is going to
make spouse and children the central focus of existence—above career or
health or anything else. On the other hand, an individual who places career
at the top of the list will act in a very different manner. Work is going to
come before family and health.
Two people with different values are likely to make very different choices when
faced with the same situation.
If quality time with spouse and children is your top value, then you’re
not going to be spending all your time at the office. Having dinner at home,
watching your son’s softball game and other family-oriented activities
will take precedence. On the other hand, if advancing your career is most important,
then your way of life and the activities you put first are going to be very
different.
Values are not the same thing as goals. Goals are promises that you make about
external actions and events. Values are your internal beliefs and principles
from which, ideally, your goals should arise.
That means we have to decide what it is we really want. We may be so caught
up in the demands of others that we don’t even know what is important to
us.
Warning Signals
If your actions are not in line with your principles, then you are likely to
experience emotional and mental distress signals, such as:
A sense of unhappiness. Pastor and motivational speaker Dr. Dwight “Ike”
Reighard says, “When we violate our internal value system, no amount of
success will bring us true satisfaction.” You may be making a great deal
of money, but if you’re ignoring other things that are more important to
you in order to do that, then you’re likely to feel dissatisfaction and
even depression, no matter how well things seem to be going.
An increased level of stress. Where there is conflict between actions
and beliefs, there is always going to be internal stress. Just as an out-of-balance
tire wears from the inside out, so this stress will wear away inside you long
before it manifests any physical symptoms.
A rudderless sense of direction. In the dark days of World War II, the
battleship Bismarck was one of Nazi Germany’s most feared weapons. Heavily
armored and sporting massive guns, it was considered nearly unsinkable. Yet,
during one early battle, a torpedo from a British warplane disabled its rudder,
and the mighty behemoth was reduced to sailing around in circles until British
Navy ships engaged and then sank the no-longer-invincible ship. Our lives can
be like the Bismarck. Unless we have the strong rudder of our values to guide
us, we frequently end up going in circles without any real sense of direction.
A disturbed conscience which gives no peace. The knowledge that we’re not
doing what we should be doing quickly becomes like a splinter that you can’t
removed from a finger. The dull ache is always there, reminding you that something
is wrong.
Where Do Your Values Come From?
Research tells us that the average American, by age 65, will have spent the
equivalent of 9.5 years watching television. That same person will have spent
less than four months attending a church or synagogue. Can you guess which institution
has a greater influence on what we think and believe?
For most people, values are shaped by popular culture. TV shows and music lyrics
tell us what we should think and how we should live. Most of these ideas are
not exactly uplifting or inspiring. In many TV dramas and sitcoms, parents are
either absent or ineffectual, while teens run their own world. Violence and
sexuality are prime staples. Traditional families are seldom to be seen.
Many people, young and old, buy into these ideas and adopt them as their own.
While some see this as manipulation, in reality most people accept it willingly
and soon come to think that the ideas and values of Hollywood are really their
own.
Most don’t seem to realize that nearly every decision about what you can
view is made by fewer than two dozen people. Do you really want their values
to become yours—by default?
If you want to live a life of integrity, your values must come from within.
Then you must put your values into action in your daily life. In that way you
can shape your world, rather than letting the world shape you.
Why concentrate so much on your inner self? Quite simply, nothing on the outside
will change as long as nothing on the inside changes.
Many doctors spend their time going to seminars on the latest way to boost their
practices. They get pumped and return to the office bursting with enthusiasm.
After a couple of days, the ardor fades and they’re back to the same old
routine.
The ideas and techniques didn’t take root and become a part of the way
the doctor thinks and feels. Nothing changed on the inside, so nothing changed
on the outside either.
Human history is like a great steel cable stretching to the horizon, while your
life is just a scratch on its side. Will anyone notice the mark that was your
life? What legacy will you leave behind? The things that people remember most
about you will not be how much money you earned, but what kind of person you
were in your dealings with others.
In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus observes, “For what profit a man, if he gain
the whole world, and lose himself.”
One of the most important steps you can take in your life is to clarify your
values. They are your compass to guide you to where you want to go. The best
way to start is to list your top 10 values and rank them in importance. The
order says not only what you want to do, but also what you are willing to give
up. It provides a benchmark by which you can make decisions when you are faced—as
you surely will be—with conflicts between actions that command either higher
or lower values.
When your life is consistent with your higher ideals, then you will be living
a life that matters. You will also possess the firm foundation that you will
need to be a survivor in both your life and your practice.
About the author: William N. Willis, D.C., manages a private practice and
is a professor at Life University, where he formerly served as division chair
of the chiropractic sciences department. Inquiries may be addressed to him at
Willis Chiropractic Clinic, 2829 Dallas St., Kennesaw, GA 30144; call (770)
429-0707 or fax (770) 425-9020.
© Copyright 2002 Today's Chiropractic